One year ago, on October 14th, 25-year-old Korean actress Cui Xueli ended her life.
After learning about it, her best friend Goo Hara, who was on tour in Japan, cried and said in the live broadcast: "My sister didn't go back to see you. I'm really sorry. I will take your share and try my best to live."
Goo Hara broke her promise. One month and ten days after Shirley's death, she sent a caption "Good night" on ins and left the world.
This pair of twins in the second-generation Korean women's group, both became famous when they were young, and both had unfortunate childhoods, and they were also subjected to cyber violence because of their boyfriend.
They supported each other through the lowest ebb, but in the end they were unable to resist fate.
When she was 7 years old, Cui Xueli's parents separated. Mother Jin Soo-jung returned to her natal family with the 1,000 won she saved, raising three children and competing for positions in society.
Life is difficult, but Shirley gives Jin Xiujing hope. Everyone around who has seen Shirley praised her for being beautiful, and "beautiful" has almost become Shirley's modifier.
Seeing her daughter's strengths, Kim Soo-jung wanted to send Shirley to the Busan Acting Academy to study.
The representatives of the college saw Shirley come to study, and showed different happiness from other students. Seeing the representative's expression, Kim Soo-jung wanted to give it another try, "Maybe it will be delicious even if it is sent to Seoul." In this way, Shirley was sent to the Performing Arts Academy in Seoul.
Six months later, Shirley received a call from her mother: "The thousand won you saved is almost gone. I'm afraid mother can only let you keep learning until next week." Shirley cried and begged her mother, saying she still wanted Learning, Jin Xiujing helpless: "Then let you study for another month at most."
In that month, director Li Bingxun selected Cui Xueli from 150 child actors when casting a cast for "Potato Nursery Rhymes", and her fate changed.
At that time, Shirley was still using her real name "Cui Zhenzhen". A reporter suggested that she change her name. She thought for a long time and said, "How about Shirley?"
The report was written the next day, and the title was "Potato Nursery Rhyme Cui Xueli, Another Little Jang Geum Is Born? ".
After seeing the report, SM, a famous Korean star-making company, contacted Shirley and promised to give her a better chance than Kim Hee Sun and make her a signature artist of SM. In 2005, Shirley joined SM Corporation.
看完报告后，韩国著名的明星制作公司SM与秀兰取得联系，并承诺给她比Kim Hee Sun更好的机会，并让她成为SM的签名艺术家。 2005年，雪莉加入了SM Corporation。
At that time, Shirley's height grew very fast, and she suddenly jumped to 170cm. This height cannot play a child, but it cannot play a mature adult. The actor's route has encountered a bottleneck, and the company has set her idol's development route.
SM's training system is very mature. Vocal music class, dance class, language class and performance class are linked together, and the practice life is very stressful. All staff’s personal skills shooting will be conducted once a week.
In addition to practice, they also have to control their weight, because Shirley has white skin and is more likely to appear fat on the mirror. The company has stricter requirements on her. When returning home, Shirley said timidly to her mother: "Today there is a sister who was scolded terribly for gaining weight."
My mother was far away in Busan, and I saw each other in a few months. Every time she separated, Shirley cried into tears. After saying "Mom walk slowly", she would ask "When will you come, mom?" A lonely night, She fell asleep holding the doll from her mother.
Not by her mother's side all the time, Shirley didn't know how to wash her hair when she was a teenager, and she didn't know to blow dry after washing. SM staff can always smell a bad smell in her hair. After the training, when everyone went to hug Shirley, they said "Shirley has worked hard, so good", while holding their noses and turning their heads over.
The effort finally paid off. In 2009, Shirley's girl group f(x) won the Best Newcomer Award at the 17th Korean National Cultural Performing Arts Awards, followed by the Golden Disc Awards and Ment Asian Music Awards.
After joining the girl group f(x), Shirley transferred the missing love to the sisters in the group. Because she was worried about pulling her sisters' hind legs, Shirley often cried and jumped in the practice room.
In an interview, she said: "I like my sisters very much and follow them very much, because I came to Seoul alone, and the only people I can rely on are my sisters."
In addition to her sister in the group, Shirley also met Goo Hara, who is also a member of the second-generation Korean girl group.
Goo Hara's road to fame is more difficult than Shirley's.
Mother left home when she was nine years old, and grandma became the physical guardian of her and her brother. The family is financially struggling, and she wants to study art, so she has to borrow to live with relatives.
The year Shirley joined SM, Koo Hola was in the third grade of junior high school at Jeonnam Middle School in Gwangju, South Korea.
Near the final exam, most of the children walked to the cram school after school. However, 14-year-old Goo Hara ran all the way to the subway station to the acting school.
In the academy, the teacher teaches how to make her voice more like a child. She practiced over and over again, expressing her emotions vigorously. The performance class was followed by a dance class, and when it was all over, it was already dark.
At 11 o'clock in the evening, Koo Hara started to walk home, and no one came to pick her up.
When returning to relatives' house at night, she needs to prepare dinner by herself. The sensible Koo Hara stood on tiptoe and served a bowl of rice, and ate it with kimchi soup and pickled pickles.
晚上回到亲戚家时，她需要自己准备晚餐。明智的Koo Hara tip起脚尖，端上一碗米饭，然后将其与泡菜汤和腌制的咸菜一起食用。
High-intensity training combined with irregular diet has resulted in Haola's body being very thin. She started to have a nosebleed within a few days of studying and even fainted.
She said: "If you don't practice, you will feel uneasy." So she jumped with a nosebleed, and went to college if she was sick.
Family members persuaded her: "Either don't study." Goo Hara disagreed, and she promised that as long as she continued to study, she would not fall into school.
家人说服了她：“要么不读书。” Goo Hara不同意，她答应只要继续学习就不会入学。
The daytime schedule was full, so she sacrificed sleep time to study. After dinner, she was afraid of waking up her sleeping cousin and tiptoedly turned on the light.
At that time, she said to the camera: "It's really hard to be an artist, so you have to work hard 100%. Even if you still fail to become an artist in the end, this time of chasing your dreams will make me happy and happy."
She went to Seoul to participate in the youth performance competition organized by SM company. In 2007, she went to the selection program of JYP company, but she failed to get good results.
It wasn't until the age of 17, because some members of the Kara girl group withdrew, that DSP company discovered her and joined the group as a substitute.
Fortunately, not long after Koo Hara joined, the girl group Kara took the world by storm with "Mr." and sang all the way to the scene of the Japanese Spring Festival Gala "Red and White Song".
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Goo Hara became the face of the group, and Japanese fans fell in love with this "Xiao Amuro Namie". At the 2011 20 "Most Influential Stars" awards ceremony, Wei Chen presented the awards to Goo Hola, who was called "a girl more beautiful than a flower".
Goo Hara成为了乐队的代言人，日本歌迷也爱上了这个“小安室奈美惠”。在2011年20届“最具影响力的明星”颁奖典礼上，魏晨将奖项颁给了被称为“比花更美丽的女孩”的Goo Hola。
At that time, Gu Hara's group Kara and Choi Xueli's group f(x) often had the opportunity to perform on the same stage.
那时，古哈拉（Gu Hara）的小组卡拉（Kara）和崔雪丽（cui Xueli）的小组f（x）通常有机会在同一舞台上演出。
In 2009 SBS "Song of Songs", the two sisters performed the same boy group song "Ring Ding Dong" on stage.
在2009年SBS的“歌曲之歌”中，两姐妹在舞台上演唱了同一支男孩组合歌曲“ Ring Ding Dong”。
It was a "reverse stage" where a women's group danced a boy's group dance, and the two people's limbs were wide open, smiling confidently at the audience.
Shirley’s career improved, and her mother Jin Xiujing stopped her job and accompany Shirley to shoot commercials and magazines.
Collecting magazines became Kim Soo-jung's pleasure. Jin Xiujing recalled this time and said: "The family was still very happy at that time."
However, such a happy situation only lasted until 2013. The love affair with Cui Zi, a member of the hip-hop group, caused Shirley to suffer an unprecedented attack.
Shirley and Cui Zi are 14 years old. Suddenly, news messages about the relationship between the two on the Internet were full of bad reviews such as "uncle's temptation," "commodity fall", and "is it a father and a daughter?"
The reporter described these comments as "even indirect expressions will make people apologize. Compared to the bad comments of other artists, it is almost unprecedented."
But Shirley didn't want to keep away from Cui Zi because of these bad reviews. She recorded the two people getting along in the diary: "Today I went to the nail salon with Cui Zi. I am very happy that there is one more thing I can do together. I am really happy at this moment. I want to remember Even if it is trivial and subtle, every loving detail."
The matter reached her mother, and she firmly opposed it. There is such a big age difference between the two, Jin Xiujing disagrees anyway.
Shirley asked her mother: "Seeing my happiness, shouldn't you bless me?" Her mother was very stubborn. She said: "From now on, let's sort everything out."
The two calculated Shirley's income over the years, and decided to write down the details for the mother to receive the money. From that day on, the mother and daughter almost cut off seeing each other, only occasionally contacting each other.
The love affair with Cui Zi became public and was also opposed by the company. In the past, Shirley used the image of a "good girl" to show people. Such a change no longer fits the setting of a girl group. One year after the exposure, Shirley withdrew from f(x) in order not to affect the whole group.
In 2016, when Koo Hara's contract with DSP Company expired, he also chose to fly solo and transform into a host and an actor.
2016年，Koo Hara与DSP Company的合同到期时，他还选择了单飞，并转型为主持人和演员。
While hosting a beauty show, Goo Ha Ra met Choi Jong Beom, the stylist's ex-boyfriend.
主持一场美容秀时，Goo Ha Ra遇到了设计师的前男友Choi Jong Beom。
In the early morning of September 13, 2018, Choi Jongbeom reported to the Gangnam Police Station in Seoul that he was beaten by Goo Harati after breaking up with Goo Harati.
When the police arrived at the scene, Hola said cowardly: "Boyfriend kicked me." After the police confirmed, they found that this was not a unilateral violence. In fact, Choi Jong-Bum broke into Goo Hara's home and abused him, and Goo Hara had to defend herself.
警察赶到现场时，霍拉co弱地说：“男友踢了我。”警方确认后，他们发现这不是单方面的暴力。实际上，崔钟范闯入Goo Hara的住所并虐待了他，而Goo Hara不得不为自己辩护。
Choi Jongbeom disclosed photos of his facial injuries to the media, and there were many satirical remarks about Goo Hara on the Korean Net News. Someone asked: "If she didn't commit violence, why didn't she come out and speak?"
Choi Jongbeom向媒体披露了他面部受伤的照片，并且在《韩国网络新闻》上有很多关于Goo Hara的讽刺言论。有人问：“如果她不暴力，她为什么不出来说话呢？”
The incident seriously affected Goo Hara's career. She had to explain the truth to the Dispatch news agency. She showed the reporter a photo of her bruise, an inspection form showing "uterine bleeding" and a surveillance video.
In the video, Goo Hara kneels on the floor at the elevator entrance. Cui Zhongfan threatened her, if you do not listen to me, I will immediately send the video of your bed to the news media.
On that kneeling, Gu Hara let go of all dignity and begged Cui Jongbeum not to send out the video.
For Goo Hara, this is a piece of "negative news" regardless of whether the conduct is just. Her career took a hit. On the other hand, Choi Jong-beom took advantage of the heat of the incident to open a 24-hour barber shop in Sinsa-dong, Gangnam-gu, Seoul.
Goo Hara bravely appealed and asked for a fair result. However, with such a large social response, the first-instance sentence was only one year and six months in prison, suspended for three years.
During that time, Shirley was not happy either.
After breaking up with Cui Zi, who has been in love for three years, Shirley feels deeply powerless. When chatting with friends, she said that she was someone who didn't need to stay in the world.
She took the initiative to throw in the controversy. At work, she gave up the pure style of the past and took over the large-scale film "Real". In life, I have posted a lot of bold photos on ins. She sprayed her mouth full of cream, did not wear underwear, drank slightly when gathering with friends, laughed and cried presumptuously.
In the comment area of these photos, men talked about her sexually, while women said that she was ashamed of a woman, and every movement was full of abuse. Cui Xueli became the "Last Wanted Artist Who Wants to Post an Ins" voted by Korean netizens.
During a live broadcast, a man at the next table kept approaching her and asked her if she could say something. She was so scared that she got under the table, her face full of fear and anxiety.
Shirley recalled that period of time and said: “People close to me gradually leave me because they are also cowardly, and they only take care of themselves. I thought about asking for help, but they didn’t reach out. That's why I collapsed."
It was Gu Ha's stretched hand that allowed Shirley to escape temporarily from the haze.
They went to the playground together, took selfies together, drank at home, comforted each other, and healed each other's pain.
On Shirley’s birthday, Goo Hara came to her home to celebrate her birthday.
The two opened the live broadcast, and Goo Hara said to the camera: "Happy birthday to Shirley, you are like a princess." Shirley hugged Hara and said, "Eone is more like a princess! Let's be a princess together."
Perhaps the friendship gave Shirley the courage. She participated in the JTBC variety show called "Night of Negative Criticism". The program set up requires artists to read out their own negative comments and respond.
When referring to the "No bra" comment, she generously admitted: "Underwear is like jewelry to me. I just hope that everyone will not be surprised. For example, I don't wear that jewelry now."
In the show "The Truth Store", she faced the camera again and grinned and said: "Friends from reporters, friends from the audience, please like me a lot. I love you."
This calmness makes people think that she has gone out of the pain caused by online reviews. But in fact, this was her last call for help from the public.
On October 14, 2019, Shirley left forever in her cabin.
This time, her mother Jin Xiujing finally came to Shirley and hugged her for an hour.
Koo Hara was participating in a record recording event in Japan that day, and she heartbrokenly posted a memorial message: "Tears keep flowing, and I still cannot believe it. The beautiful truth in countless photos...the truth."
When the emotions were backlogged into the night, Hola opened the live broadcast to miss Shirley, "I and Shirley are really close sisters. I want to say goodbye to Shirley so I opened the live broadcast, I'm sorry! Shirley, I will take you with you. Part, and work hard to live."
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In order to catch up with the memorial ceremony, Hora flew back to Korea. In the following month, she returned to perform in Japan, stood on the stage, smiled and agreed with the fans to see you next time.
Perhaps Hola really thought about taking Shirley's share and staying strong.
On the evening of November 23, Koo Hara posted a photo on the ins. She lay on her side on the bed, smiling peacefully and saying "good night" to everyone.
Under this photo, there are hot comments like "Looking at her face always feels like ET, a demon-like appearance" "Lying down to make money is what it means"...…
Unexpectedly, this became the last photo of Hola during his lifetime.
On November 24, she passed away. The reason the relatives revealed was that painful things were intertwined, which made her feel very hard. Koo Hara is only 28 years old this year, but she has experienced too many sorrows and joys in her life.
11月24日，她去世了。亲戚透露的原因是痛苦的事情交织在一起，这使她感到很难受。 Koo Hara今年只有28岁，但是她一生经历了太多的悲伤和欢乐。
The two civilian girls, Goo Hara and Cui Xueli, became the focus through personal efforts in Korean society where the ascending passage was almost closed. Such an inspirational story unexpectedly came to a tragic ending. ,
两位平民女孩Goo Hara和Cui Xueli通过个人努力成为了朝鲜社会的关注焦点，因为上升通道几乎被关闭。这样一个鼓舞人心的故事出人意料地以悲剧性结局。 ，
According to some statistics, nearly 30 artists in South Korea committed suicide within ten years. The Korean showbiz is like a burial ground for actresses.
Under the dual oppression of Korean star-making factories and social rules, the public opinion pressure and gender gaze that Korean actresses have suffered are unimaginable.
Shirley’s ex-boyfriend, Cui Zi, once wrote a rap song called "Eat and Sleep". After the song was released, netizens would match Shirley with the sexual cues in the lyrics. The doctor advised her to go for routine gynecological examinations, and there were rumors that she was pregnant and had an abortion.
"Private life is chaotic, improper behavior, unmarried and first pregnant" all these unnecessarily bad reviews are put on her head. Sister Tiffnay of the same company said: "Shirley will read the negative reviews on the Internet one by one, and then spend a few hours calming down."
Five months before Gu Hola's death, on a performance stage, due to an accident, her white tube top skirt slipped off accidentally. When she finished her back to the camera, she arranged her clothes in time and finished the performance. But after the incident, netizens said almost overwhelmingly, "Intentionally, she just wanted to expose herself."
One year after her death, the final verdict on the violence of her ex-boyfriend Choi Jong-Bum was announced. Cui Zhongfan was sentenced to only one year.
The most controversial part of the privacy video is not included in the conviction. The court’s reasoning was: “Although the sexual relationship video was not approved by the victim (Koo Hara), it was considered that the two were victims of a romantic relationship and did not stop it at the time, so it could not be considered a sneak shot.” In the end, suspected sexual violence Was found not guilty.
What is even more annoying is that the judge who tried the secret filming case asked to play this secret filming video in court. Finally, at the insistence of the lawyer, the judge gave up playing this secret video in court.
There are thousands of incidents like Goo Hara being secretly photographed in South Korea every year. From the Zhang Ziyan incident to "Room N", South Korea's malice towards women has never disappeared.
每年都有数千起类似Goo Hara的事件在韩国被秘密拍摄。从张紫艳事件到“ N室”，韩国对妇女的恶意从未消失。
In 2017, Shirley traveled to Cuba to relax. After seeing children playing football on the street, she forgot that she was an idol, wore slippers and played happily with the children.
After returning to China, Shirley printed the letters Cuba on her fingerprints.
She said: "Cuba is a very special country. It is one of the countries that I hope it would be better if it doesn't change. If there is something angry or wronged, you can feel peaceful by looking at this tattoo."
When she was twenty-three, Shirley made her bucket list on a show. Marriage is the first priority. Secondly, she also wants to take scuba diving, go to the prairie to see the stars, participate in pajamas, visit the safari park, and travel in space.
Perhaps Cui Xueli and Goo Hara's wishes are simple, they just want to obtain ordinary and legitimate happiness in the world. But this wish is so difficult to realize.
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